Truth....?

To live in the moment - no matter the consequences for yourself or others.
Or:
To live in accordance with respect for self and others, whether you live in the moment or not.

What is truth? What isn't? I have thought for some time that the rendering of the actions belies our true philosophy. I am concerned for those who are unable to do this. "Love is an action word" someone once said to me. And when those actions decimated those closest to that person, I understood that "love" in this instance was not present. So often I hear people say the things they wish to believe in, then watch them completely contradict themselves by their actions - unknowingly (it would seem). Is the simple desire to live well and with integrity enough? This is something I truly do not know.

I once read the Toltec philosophies and have tried to live by these for some time - to the best of my ability. But the cop out in that philosophy is clear - and I wonder if I perhaps cling to that "cop out" more than I realise....or maybe others see my actions as completely at odds to this stated intent, as I have seen this in others.

The Toltec Philosophies (as interpreted by moi):
1. Live and act with integrity. (I have interpreted this as honesty in though, word AND action - representing yourself clearly and consistently. Doing what you say you are going to do.)
2. Never make assumptions. (This I have thought is about "perceived truth" - never form conclusions unless you have all the information you need to do so - and in fact, we never have "all" the information!)
3. Do not take anything personally. (Others act from their internal processes, experiences, and expectations - things we cannot see or know. For this reason, we should NOT think we are the only being in the picture. What is happening for others can affect their behaviour toward us - this does not mean it is "about" us.) This aspect I feel is instrumental in allowing forgiveness and compassion.
4. Always do your best (to live by the first 3 above). This - I have started to think - is the cop out. It allows us to keep trying when we fail, but does it give us a sense of responsibility for our actions?

I am currently struggling with No. 4. I have watched someone close to me systematically wreck their lives and attempt to also wreck the lives of those who love them. And I have had No. 4 flung back at me when I express concern at that person's actions. "But...I'm doing my best!".

My initial reaction to this was to accept this as a given, and accept that the consequences would at least be a lesson somewhere for this person. Now I doubt the actual integrity of the actions themselves. So - if you are only saying - instead of doing - you are automatically not living through No. 1. Does this automatically discount the remainder of the philosophies?

And what of No. 2 and No. 3? If we don't make assumptions (i.e. make a judgement based on the information we DO have), then how do we avoid repeating mistakes, and consistently creating negative consequences for ourselves and for others?

If we don't take anything personally, then how can we accept advice given in good faith and with love and compassion? How do we learn? And keep learning?

Now that I am have had demonstrated in front of me the failure of this stance I am now doubting the integrity of the philosophy as a whole....and the rightness of it. The truth of it.

I wonder at my own ability to "cop-out" with No. 4 and start to think.... What if No. 4 wasn't there? Would we constantly fail and stop trying? Or would we not fail at all - or worse - not acknowledge the failures and learn from them?

I find that truth is as subjective as it is objective - as fluid as water - as ethereal as smoke. I find the only truth that I cannot challenge....

I am.